Growth and Barriers

What we grew up with doesn’t have to hold us down.

photo by author

As I pulled into my parking space at the grocery store, I looked up from my steering wheel and saw Tree. Evidently, as it was growing up, Fence was installed nearby, and everyone assumed that Tree would stay on its own side. Tree didn’t get the memo. Just kept growing…through, into, around Fence.

Look closely at this picture. There are ways in which diamonds of Fence have lived so long with Tree that there are Fence-shaped scars. Us too. We carry our own fence-shaped scars, visible and invisible.

But as you can see, Fence was unsuccessful at keeping Tree from growing. It grew anyway. It grew however and wherever it wanted. It’s a big tall tree, full of fat, vibrant, green leaves. Doing just fine. Yeah, scars. Sure, some difference from your average tree. But look at it! Fence did not get in the way of anything crucial.

Me neither. I got fence-shaped scars all over me. Obsessions, neuroses, depression, fears. It’s fine. Those are just diamonds of bark, somewhere near the bottom of my tree. But look up! Look at that amazing canopy. My friendships, my wife, my children, my animal family. My writing, music that came through me, quilts. My yoga practice, my teaching practice! Plus, I wrote a novel (will be available next year)! And soon there will be a…